Friday, August 5, 2005

The Flight of the Dov

“They all have a certain look” explained Hikind, who added, “It is nice to do what is politically correct but we’re talking about terrorism” as he justified his controversial remarks.

It seems like a pretty sorry day here in Brooklyn: our State Assemblyman, Dov Hikind, called on city officials to arrange for racial profiling of potential terrorist bombers in New York City, under the new "random inspection" order here. My first reaction was, "here we go, back to the beloved mid-20th century—McCarthyism and the KKK."

But then I thought that maybe I'd better walk a few steps (I don't think I could handle a mile) in the Dov's shoes, and see whether there's any substance to his psychosis. So here we go...inside the mind of prominent NYS Assemblyman Dov Hikind...

...Those people all look alike—never mind John Walker Lindh and Tim McVeigh—they're the exceptions that prove the rule...we all know how they look...scrawny, kind of a light cocoa-skinned complexion, like smudges on yellow wallpaper...dark-eyed with a short beard, kind of a four-day growth...some of them wear turbans, I think—or is that some other group that's not quite as dangerous? No matter: they've all got that shifty look—dark, sickly, skulking, like stray cats around a garbage dumpster...and of course they all will have backpacks big enough to hold a bomb...or maybe they could even fit it in a shoulder bag...Hell, you could slip a bomb into an unabridged copy of War and Peace...but wait, those people can't read, or at least they don't read our books...only their weird Bible—the name of it starts with "K" or "Q" depending on which crazy sect or cell they're connected to...Shit, they can't even settle on how to spell the name of their Bible and they call it the word of God! Maybe we should see about banning that book, anyway, under the Patriot Act or something, since it tells those people that they have to come to New York and kill us all and themselves, too...Yeah, those Arabs...that's what they're like, the slimy bastards....I could spot one of these terrorists a mile away...

In response, the NYPD, God bless them, released a terse statement saying: "Racial profiling is illegal, of doubtful effectiveness, and against department policy."

Listen, Dov: if you're scared, that's fine. Many of us are. But there's a big difference between fear and panic. Learn the difference, and know that there are lots of us out here in the real world that don't spend most of their time safe in Albany, but have to get on that subway every day, with the lurking consciousness that it could be our last ride. So be afraid, and be public about your fear if you have to—just don't spread panic here. If you feel that sick and weak from your fear that you are going to descend into racist paranoia, then quit your job, get the hell out of Albany, out of New York City, and sure as hell out of Brooklyn, and go wherever you think your paranoid schizophrenic ass will be safe. But don't hang around here dragging the people of New York into your cesspool of delusion and bigotry, because we don't need to hear it.

The more we allow ourselves to be influenced by your paranoid ideation, Dov, the more we will become exactly like the enemy we wish to defeat. Our panic would be their victory.

Already, some other nut case, a NYC Councilman appropriately named Oddo, is joining Dov in promoting this hysteria. It's our job as citizens of a democracy to call down these lunatics and expose them and their illness for what they are—the kind of thought and behavior that deserve not debate, but psychopharmaceutical medication.

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